Jesse Jackson Quoted by Canadian Funding Corp
It seems to us at Canadian Funding Corp Innovations that whenever something bad happens to a famous person (think Bill Clinton – philandering), the Reverend Jesse Jackson is right there to have his quotes gobbled up by the media. We are certain that he is eager for the press coverage.
Yes, MIchael Jackson’s death is sad, particularly with the fact that he left behind three oddly named children. But why does Jesse Jackson’s presence have to be so – so – well – present. Certainly Jesse and Michael were not separated at birth although they do share the same last name. He has been consoling the Jackson family (not his own family considering his own righteous philandering). He has been advocating for them to have additional autopsies performed. He is all over the story.
“Now Rev. Jesse Jackson wants everybody to not commit suicide,” said a Canadian Funding Corp representative. “It’s a nice idea although we think that the Michael Jackson fans that are so distraught are not going be particularly listening to his message of mental hygiene. On the other hand, since he carries the same last name, the suicidal fans who are not thinking clearly may think that he belongs to Michael Jackson family.”
At this point Canadian Funding Corp asks at which church the Reverend performs his clergyman duties. Okay, that was probably unfair but we wonder a lot of things about the Jesster.
Here is a quote from Jesse Jackson. “This is a time when hearts are heavy. There is great pain but great cause to celebrate Michael’s life. It made Michael happy saying ‘We Are the World.’ Don’t self destruct. We fall down sometimes, we get back up. That’s the right thing to do. In Michael’s name let’s live together as brothers and sisters and not die apart as fools.”
Oh brother.
Pavel Talalayev, a Russian Jackson impersonator who spent years and thousands of dollars on cosmetic surgery to look like his idol, was among the first to attempt to take his own life. “I started receiving calls from other fans, I tried to calm them down…And then I let myself go,” he told Russian news site Life.ru, as translated by MosNews, after his rescue by doctors. “I don’t know why the doctors saved me. I want to be with Michael.” No comment. Really. No comment.
At Canadian Funding Corp Innovations we regret any loss of life. We think it is a tragedy when anyone takes their life. We are only commenting on the personalities that are involved. Especially our favourite Jesster.
